Several weeks ago @Fave asked the female Twitteratti, how would we finish the question "Why do men..." and he said he would answer via his blog. As a recently displaced resident of Houston, thank you Ike, he hasn't had time to write. So, I'm asking for your thoughts on these mysteries of the ages:
1. Why do men touch and scratch their penises throughout the day; does it move on its own; and why can't they control it?
2. Why do men lie so much?
3. Why do men cheat on wives, girlfriends and significant others?
4. Why do men get obsessed with sports?
5. Why do men fight and make noises when fighting?
6. Why do men like gadgets and cars?
7. Why do men have trouble asking for directions and help in general?
8. Why do men enjoy pornography?
9. Why do men treat women like they are stupid?
10. Why do men spit, what are they spitting out; and how does it get there?
11. Why do men have trouble saying "I love you" or sharing their feelings generally?
12. Why do men pimp when they walk?
13. Why do men pee on the seat, the floor or their pants?
14. Why do men think they don't need to wash their hands?
15. Why do men want to have threesomes?
Any enlightenment on the above would be greatly appreciated.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
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- Shannon
- I live in Washington, DC, one of the most beautiful places on earth. My personal mantra, "live your life, this isn't a dress rehearsal, you don't get very many do-overs, and guilt is a wasted emotion."
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6 comments:
I have to admit that as a man, I take umbrage with some of these generalizations.
Personally I rarely lie, I would never cheat on my wife, I haven't been in a fight since I was like 12, I have no issues asking for help, I do not treat women like they are stupid, have no trouble saying I love you, I don't "pimp" when I walk, pee on the seat, the floor or my pants, I wash my hands frequently and have no desire to have a threesome.
Now, I will say that I enjoy sports (obsessed might be overkill), I do enjoy gadgets, I have watched pornography, and I do spit and all men do scratch our crotches (full disclosure, our genitals itch on occasion.)
Most of these questions hit solely on qualities posessed by the worst examples of men in our culture, and unfortunately, our culture is obsessed with scandal, so liars, cheats and jerks tend to get the spotlight.
Lastly, amny of these are not limited to men and they are broad generalizations that could easily be asked about women as well.
1. Why are women obsessed with celebrities/fashion/reality television?
2. Why do women lie so much?
3. Why do women cheat on their husbands, boyfriends and significant others?
4. Why do women like shoes and clothes?
5. Why do women enjoy pornography (because plenty of them do)?
6. Why do women treat men like they are children?
7. Why do women need constant reinforcement of someone's love for them?
I could keep going, but there's no need. Generalizations like these don't give anyone insight into any specific person, they reinforce common stereotypes about the worst examples of either gender.
Rant over.
Oh jeez -theres only one simple answer to your "rant-ette" -because we're dumb primates!
Its like the old joke "Why do dogs... because they can!" -thats why we're quite often amused by fart jokes, breasts on TV, violent tackles in the big game etc. I really do credit you lady folk for having the brains.
That said -i'm kinda happy beign a neanderthal, and like to think i'm at least at the higher end of the primate evolutionary scale. :)
Most of these miss the mark for me. about 4 or 5 are spot on.
It's funny that we're wired so differently.
Don't get me started on my list....
We are wired differently, that's for sure.
Ahhh, all the previous responses have been brilliant. Spot on, and not.
1. Sometimes we just need to. But GH was right about itching. Sometimes you just need to adjust your shit too.
2. Why do women lie so much. Its part of the great mystery of humanity. However, as the commenter on the "Why do women..." post said, it boils down to immaturity.
Lying is fundamentally a sign of disrespect for the person. Not that its good or bad (I don't believe in either). It just doesn't work if you want a certain type of relatedness. If you don't care, then lying is fine.
3. Why do women? Again, the causes vary but it does come down to fundamental issues like communication (or lack of), immaturity,
4. Wouldn't know. Have no such obsession. Unless snowboarding counts. Never played sports so I have no emotional attachment to any.
5. It just comes out? Trying to scare your opponent, kinda like the "Rebel Yell"? Like GH, haven't fought in a long time.
6. Shiny!!!! Speaking as a geek, of course. I think it comes down to just the allure of surpassing some established mark - speed, cost, features. I can't honestly say that I think its just fascination with human progress, although for some it may be.
But for me, "Oooohhh! Shiny!"
7. Don't have that problem. Blame ego. I like being right (and often am) but have no need to be, or to justify myself. My ego doesn't like me very much at all.
8. Visual creatures, generally. I use it to learn new things. But of course, I've watched for so long that I can't watch US pr0n anymore. I spend too much time reviewing and critiquing. European stuff has much better production values and writing.
But I digress. I say visual. Watching pr0n has nothing to do with being immature, methinks. Its all about context. Watching with your partner can add something to your relationship, as long as you've established a supportive context for it. Or it can create a detrimental or even destructive context for a relationship.
"The context is decisive." - Landmark Education
9. Insecurity? Maybe. Immaturity? Maybe. Failure to think. Highly likely.
10. Don't spit. Find it disgusting. Maybe the answer lies in China?
11. Haven't had this problem. Benefits of being a water sign? But for others, I'd say probably socialization. Men teach their male children that to do so is a sign of weakness. It propagates. Gotta break the cycle somewhere.
12. Because we can, dammit! *smirk*
13. Bad aim, or rushing. Which comes back to failure to think. That damn humanity again! Doh!
14. They do? Heh heh heh. Seriously, this one I believe is a learned behavior much like not showing emotion. Just like being OCD is learned/taught.
15. Because more is better! Heh heh heh. Or maybe just to say they did. Maybe most men feel they've had rather unsatisfying sex lives generally, and to do so would add something that they feel is missing. Again, people always obsess about the things they don't have which completely does not serve them. Or maybe we just like sex? :D
I have to say that both genders have stereotypes but there's one that gets me pissed regarding both. That is the obsession with celebrities.
However it does seem that women/gay men are the ones really propagating that shit.
So who really cares what celebrity is doing what?
As for the gadgets, being an engineer, it's my job. I get paid more than a doctor so I think you'd like gadgets too.
In light of the emotion thing...
Emotions are weak aspects of ourselves and easily get out of hand. So with that said, why do women always try to get emotion out of men? Basically I think this is due to women having to manipulate a reaction out of everyone in their life. It's a girl thing. For instance, if I don't give a woman the time of day she gets all pissed off then attempts to have me get all emotional when I just really don't care. Wait...is not caring an emotion?
Remember, many things have been killed because of emotions so maybe it'd be better if we acted in a more logical fashion.
So girls, stop the games.
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